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Shut Up And Get On the Bus
By
Mike Roselle
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Right
now they are logging in the Biscuit....Only I don’t
think of it as the Biscuit. I think of it as the Klamath Siskiyou
Wilderness. I
think of Bald Mountain, China
Left, Hobson Horn, Sugarloaf, Bear Pen and other places that the United
States
Forest Service committed the ecological equivalent of murder in the
name of
their latest repackaged version of better forest management. When will
these
knuckleheads get it? Logging old-growth, anywhere is illegal. To
import,
export, sell, store, invest-in or buy old-growth timber is illegal. I
know
because I just learned this at ELAW. The other thing I learned at ELAW
is that
when some wild-eyed, crazy activist gets in your face, while you are
talking to
someone much more interesting, and tells you to get on the bus to a
muddy road
in the middle of nowhere, and go get yourself beat up, and arrested, is
that
you should just shut up and Get On the Bus.
I didn’t and I still
regret it, even though I told
Laurel
to go out and buy me an extra large Kryptonite Lock at Freddy Meyers.
My lawyer
reminded me that I was out on bail but assured me she could keep me out
of
Guantanamo
but made no guarantees against a long ride to
Roseburg
from the Josephine County Jail handcuffed behind my back in the rear
seat of
what passes for cop cars these days. I miss the days when the law
enforcement
community was unconcerned about fuel economy.
The next morning I realized that my co-workers at Mountain
Justice Summer have me scheduled to be arrested and beat up in
West
Virginia in May. I can’t possibly get beat up
and
arrested before I get arrested and beat up. Or is it the other way
around?
Anyway
Laurel was actually
much
more interesting then the person I was actually talking with. Sorry
Jake.
Anyway, nobody will tell me anything anymore. They’re afraid that the
next
morning I will wake up, drink a whole pot of coffee, have a smoke, tune
in Mojo
Nixon, turn on my computer and write about it. And since I probably
wouldn’t
remember it anyway, you should look elsewhere on this site for
additional
details. Personally I think details are way over-rated. Hell, I’d never
even
seen the Bear Pen Timber Sale when I was arrested there last year. It
was
enough for me that it was going to be really big and well organized. It
wasn’t
either, but as Uncle Ramon would say “We got ink”. And the cops were
real nice
to us after awhile. Don’t expect the cops to be nice to you down there;
I was
arrested by some of their fathers before the cop sperm beat the hippie
sperm to
their mama’s whatever. Anyway, I can promise you that if you try the
food at
the Josephine County Jail, you will never complain about airplane food
again.
You will probably never eat macaroni with canned government precooked
hamburger
and cheese again either. Eating will be hard for a while. Some Hippies
can’t
eat for a couple of weeks after they get out. I usually head straight
to the
Wonder Burr.
What I want to say, though, is the latest round of Biscuit
timber sales are criminal acts and they make me very angry. It is once
again up
to us and us alone to fight them. We must stand together. Unfortunately
I can’t
be there. Maybe you can. If you see
Laurel’s
Bus in your neighborhood, don’t ask questions. Just shut up and get on.
I
didn’t. I’m going to the Iron Horse to talk to Wayne-o about a float
trip this
fall. Eat your heart out Hippies.
