Lowbagger.org     

        "A voice in the cyberspace wilderness."                                                  February 2005      

Mean Streets
By Phil Knight
These mean streets are ruled
by the automobile
Not by anything
that can think or feel
Gas-guzzling monsters
roar past my house
Don't get in the way
if you're a cat or a mouse
You don't stand a chance
if you are alive
Make way for more pavement
'cause folks gotta drive!
Drive to the mall
for a magazine
Drive to the bar
to check out the scene
Drive just to drive
for something to do
Drive to the drive-in
Drive to the zoo
Drive-through banks
Drive-through fast food
Drive through Wilderness
Check out my ride dude!
 
You're driving me crazy
There's nowhere to run
I think I'll drive somewhere
And buy me a gun
Go wild with road-rage
Take back these mean streets
Force everyone
To take to their feets
Tear up all the pavement
With giant machines
Bring back the farmland
Turn blacktop to green
Pile all the cars
Into the Berkeley Pit
How many millions
Do you think would fit?
Then I'll go on outside
Take a breath of fresh air
Now listen you bastards!
It's quiet out there!
You can hear the rain
Instead of roaring trucks -
How to make it last
Is really the crux
 
So cap all the wells
Leave the oil in the ground
Burn the Winnebagos
Love that crackling sound!
Sab the lawn-mowers
Sink the jet-skis
Bury the dirt-bikes
Smash the ORVs
Crumple the Harleys
Flatten the SUVs...
It's shock-treatment therapy
For consumption disease!

 


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Short, Aggressive Manifesto on Education
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Floogle Watch
The $11 Martini
By Uncle Ramon

Poet's Lounge
His Likable Ways, and Shock and Awe
By Greg Keeler

Mean Streets
By Phil Knight

Love is a Glove
By Derek Cook

Mountain Step
How to Lowbag a Peak
By John Fothergill

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At the Barbershop
By Peter Crumbaker

Fiction Focus
Coyote Goes Snowboarding
By Phil Knight